Tuesday, 20 December 2011

News for Dummies 20/12

Kim Jong il is now Kim Jong Dead we all knew he'd push the button, just not on his life support. Millions of people wept because propaganda has them under the veil of perseption that he wasn't a cunt.

"The Only way is Essex" whore Jessica Wright sent out a heart-warming R.I.P message on twitter about Kim Jong il, because being a cunt had her under the veil of perception that he wasn't a cunt. 

R.I.P British Television.

Tribute from TOWIE

Saddam Hussein, Osama Bin Ladan, Muammar Gaddafi , Kim Jong il... All Dead; Jeremy Clarkson must be shitting himself!!

The Sun published a story urging people to come forward and offer themselves as foster carers; lets hope paedophiles don't read The Sun.... What? Only paedophiles read The Sun???

I understand this would make me a paedophile but I swear I was only here for research purposes <=== Also a Sun Journalists excuse in court when his hard-drive gets seized

Schools are going to make History a compulsory subject until you are 16; Let’s hope they do it before a TOWIE slag tweets an RIP message about Hitler.

BT want to sue Google claiming that they stole some of their ideas; that's funny I've never been put on hold for a Google search while being charged for it, they must have left that idea. Since BT have fell out with Google they’ll have to Ask Jeeves to find a good lawyer and will probably end up with a gardener.

A man driving a Land Rover veered off the road and killed 15 sheep; We think it was 15 the man counting them kept falling asleep. The community where just thankful it actually was sheep and not just the slow kids from the local school after the nativity.

P.S. if you were a sheep in your schools nativity you are probably going to be lonely again this Xmas.


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